On Tuesday morning, I attended my second pitstop meeting with a beautiful group of people from the Haberfield Baptist Church. I was introduced to this online connect group through a beautiful friend who recognised that my heart was hungry for a community of believers who are running after a deep, experiential and intimate knowledge of God. What I love so much about this group is that everyone is encouraged to share their hearts and every contribution is valued.
The topic of discussion on Tuesday, was God choosing to partner with us. This reality, is one that is very close to my heart. I have often pondered the paradox of an all-powerful God who chooses to do His work through humble people. There are so many examples just in chapter 11 in the book of Hebrews, proving this. God does the impossible THROUGH his chosen people. One of these examples of partnership was raised by the beautiful Amy, who shared her revelation on the instance of Nehemiah, whose dream was rebuilding the walls of the temple.
There are so many things that I love about this story and so many revelations that you can draw from the book of Nehemiah:
- Nehemiah was so moved over the news about the broken-down walls of the temple that his boss (king Artaxerxes) could see it on his face!
- Nehemiah was so respected in his high profile, ‘secular job’ that he was not only given time off to work on his dream, but he was sent off with the king’s blessing, resources and military protection!
- The incredible way that Nehemiah continued to prayerfully direct this building project – at every challenge he turned to God for help and wisdom.
The list goes on…
However, the revelation that Amy shared was something I hadn’t considered in any great depth. She pointed out how groups of people were tasked with building different sections of the wall – and then she said: “You just need to build what’s in front of you.” That little sentence tugged at my heart so intensely.
Have you ever felt guilty for taking the time to do what you believe God has called you to do? Does it feel like your time should be spent doing other things that are more pressing and important? Have you felt that pressure to help others build their piece of the wall, because it seems more significant or important than that thing that God has put on your heart to do?
I am holding my hand up!
A number of years ago, God called me to write. It took some time to really pay attention to the call. There was a lot to overcome; gnawing insecurities, limited time and very little know-how. But slowly and surely, things started to fall into place.
In December 2018 my husband bought me a laptop for my birthday. His way of giving me a nudge in the right direction. I started to take baby steps forward. It was interesting to see how quickly the words started to flow, once I opened my laptop and started typing. By March 2019 I had a manuscript, but I wasn’t sure where to go or what to do with it. Later that year, I joined a mentoring programme called Unlocking Your Book. I took the time to learn how to do what I believed God was calling me to do.
In November 2020, I published my first book, Untangled. Within the next four to six weeks, I will be publishing a children’s book (it’s a wild, incredible God-story, but too much info for this post). And I have just finished my third manuscript!
Why am I telling you this? Well, because even though I know God has called me to write, I have struggled with it. It has been a constant wrestle between my heart and my head. I have had to turn down opportunities to serve in other capacities. I have made decisions turn away job applications, even though our family could have done with a few extra pounds in the bank.
My piece of the wall does not always feel significant, especially when I look at what others’ are building. The bricks and mortar in my hands often feel much less substantial than the ones that other people are building with. And sometimes, I really worry about being criticized for my clumsy building techniques. But I am not responsible for other parts of the wall. I am responsible for mine.
I just need to keep building what is in front of me.
And so do you, dear friend!
Let’s bravely continue to build our piece of the wall – one brick at a time. That dream that God has planted in your heart is significant. It has been wired into your very being, even before you were born. Don’t second guess it or play it down. Start building. Boldly.
After all, you are not building on your own. You have favour with the King. You have access to His favour, resources and protection. The God who partnered with Nehemiah (and Abraham, and Moses, and David, and Mary, and Paul and all those heroes of faith), is the same God who is in partnership with you!
The God of heaven [has appointed us for His purpose and] will give us success; therefore we His servants will arise and build…
Nehemiah 2:20 AMP
Today, I hear the Father say:
“My Bold Builder. How I delight in your ‘YES’! My heart rejoices as you partner with my promises. As you trust in my strength, wisdom, resources and protection. I hold the blueprint for the dream in your heart. I will never leave you to figure it all out on your own. Trust me for the first step, and I will show you the next one. Step by step we will see that dream come true. For that dream is mine, too. The dream I planted in you.” ❤